So often when interacting with others, the focus is on what we are saying and what we want out of the interaction. Taking the time practicing how to connect with others will help improve your communication and how well your interactions go with others.
There is always so much more to communication that a simple “6 steps”, but this should give you a few steps to follow and an activity to go through to get you on the path to creating rapport with the people you interact with.
Try the following:
Be Present / Be Still: When communicating be present. Truly hear what they have to say. Focus on what they are saying, not on what you will say next. One of the easiest ways to be present is to be still. Settle your mind, your breathing, and your emotions. Be still and be present with the person you are communicating with.
Breath: Connect with your breath. Breathe into the bottom of your belly and fill it to the top of your chest. Notice how you are breathing, is it fast or slow, high or low? Notice what is happening for you right now. And once you know what is happening for you and how you are breathing, notice the same things in the person you are communicating with.
Eyes: Connect with the person’s eyes. Not for the whole time but all thorough out the conversation. Really see that person and show them that you are looking at what they are saying, that you are present with them.
Posture: Sit or stand the same as the other person, not mimicking, but matching. This is a subtle process where you just notice a crossed leg, how they hold them selves, where there arms are and what they may or may not be leaning on and doing something similar to them.
Smile: Is there really more to say? If you hear something that is meaningful for you and you like, let them know. A warm friendly smile will some times break down barriers in communication.
Connection: This is all about connection. Connect your body to the moment. Connect with your breath, with the person’s eyes and meet them with a smile. Imagine that there is a link between you and the other person, like an unseen bond that keeps you both present in the now.
This is truly just a sneak peak into what rapport is but I know if you can do one or all of these every day with each person you communicate with you will find you begin to create a deeper connection with everyone you meet.
Personal Connection Ritual
This activity should be done once a day or how every many times you would like to do it. All you need is a mirror, and the most important person. YOU!
The reason why you go through this activity is to connect you with you. Become comfortable with yourself and who you are. Connect with you at a deep level so that way when it comes time to connect with others you are ready to do it at a deeper level.
Personal Connection Ritual:
Stand in front of a mirror keeping your mind and body as still as possible, stand how the most confident you would stand.
Close your eyes and connect with your breath. Take a deep breath all the way into the bottom of your belly, filling it from the bottom all the way to the top of your chest and exhale. (Do these 3 or more times)
Open and connect with your eyes in the mirror and say the following mantra, “I am complete and whole lacking nothing” (Repeat 3 or more times)
Smile with a warm, loving smile at your self and imagine what truly connecting with you feels like.
Say “Thank You”
If you go through this process once, once a day or once a week I guarantee you will feel more connected with you and with others. And I challenge every one to give this a go for 1 week every day and just see what happens.
Rock and Roll
PS. What is the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?