“It’s easy, it is the same as the last project we ran!” said the project manager.
It is the same old problem; we like to speak the way we like to speak. It is never about how others do it.
The comparison filter will help you understand that some people see sameness only, sameness with exceptions, sameness and then the differences, sameness and differences equally, differences with similarities and differences only.
Once you know how people compare things, you will be able to present information in a way that will enable that person the best chance of hearing you and responding. What will happen over time is you will see a consistent type of information come back from people, enabling you to know how you will receive feedback from each team member. This means you will be able to avoid the frustration of not being on the same page as them, as you know the page they are reading from.
So the question you might ask is: “What is the relationship between these three coins?”
And you might respond with….
Sameness only; these three coins are the same, they are all round, they all say liberty and they all have a face on them.
Sameness with exceptions; these three coins are all the same, except one has the head upright.
Sameness and differences equally; they are all the same colour, they are all round, they are all sitting in a different spot, two are turned to the left and one is pointing up.
Differences with similarities; the three coins are sitting in different spots and some are orientated differently, but they are all round and the same colour.
Differences only; the coins are not orientated the same.
How you might speak to each filter type.
Sameness only = “It’s the same kind of task as you’ve been doing…”
Sameness with exceptions = “this is the same as the last project, except a different client…”
Sameness with differences equally = “this job has the same title as the last one you did, it should have the same outcome, but you will also find there are less details in the description and a different client.”
Differences with similarities = “this job is very different to the last one you did, though it is with the same customer.”
Differences only = “this job is different to anything we have done before.”
Rock and Roll
PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?