Think of Neo in the matrix, he had all of his love focused on one person, Trinity.

In previous versions of the matrix, the anomaly had a more generalised focus, on all of humanity.

People are no different in our matrix, if you have taken the time to notice peoples Meta programs you will be able to answer the following question.

Are people focused on them selves, others or both?

If you can pick this up about people you will be able to communicate to all of these types of focuses, by saying….

Self = “This concerns you in many ways…”

Others = “Since I know you’re concerned for everyone’s well-being…”

Both = “We should consider how this will effect you and the team..”

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?



We sort of covered this in a previous blog, so I will get right to the point.

“Do you have a planner? Or do you prefer to live in the moment and take each day as it comes?

A in time person is more likely to be in the moment and act on what is right in front of them.

A through time person likes to have a plan and stick to a schedule!

So when you look around the office at people, who is just working on what ever is happening right now, jumping from thing to thing. Who is working to a schedule, out of their calendar or based of a task tracking tool?

When you know this you might say to either person the following when it comes to getting something done.

In Time = “Since we are apt to loose track of time here…let’s stick to the schedule but keep our options open and moving forward on tasks as they come up…”

Through Time = “As you are aware, time is of the essence…let’s take a step by step approach and keep on track…”

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?


When we come up against a challenge in any situation, aside from freaking out and getting angry; there are three key ways (in the context of NLP meta programs) that we might go about responding to a challenge.

We will think about it, feel something or make a choice.

“Tell me about a work situation that gave you trouble. How did you respond to it?”

Do you think through what has happened in detail, analysing every thing that has happened?

Do you have a physical reaction, a feeling that runs through your body?

Do you make a choice about how it will affect you and take that course of action?

Knowing some one else’s challenge response filter will enable you to work with it, as opposed to coming up against constant barriers.

When you have noticed how someone reacts to a challenge an you know their filter, try saying the following.

Thinking = “As you consider the situation, you’ll realise how you need to…”

Feeling = “I know have strong feelings about this situation, and…….”

Choice = “You can decide how you want to respond to…”

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?

Some Thoughts

I think if you have read any of my filter blog posts you will have guessed by now that people are complex, but by asking the right questions you can get to know how they see the world.

I must say though, I am compelled to point out something I find very important, something I want you to get.

The reason we suck at communication as a species is that we are selfish, we focus only on how we say things. It is very rare that someone takes the time to truly hear another person, listen to how they are saying something. Take the time to truly hear them.

I am not saying that you should read my blog and you will get it because it is easy.

It is the opposite, to be a great communicator takes work. Hard work (heart work), it takes time, it takes focus and will power to suspend you ego and focus on the other person. Not just what you want to say.

I can say for sure though, if you put in the effort you will find your communication with others improves to a whole new level.

Stuff tools of deception and influence, spend time listening, communicating in others model of reality and then you will get the outcomes you hope to get from communication.

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?


“It’s easy, it is the same as the last project we ran!” said the project manager.

It is the same old problem; we like to speak the way we like to speak. It is never about how others do it.

The comparison filter will help you understand that some people see sameness only, sameness with exceptions, sameness and then the differences, sameness and differences equally, differences with similarities and differences only.

Once you know how people compare things, you will be able to present information in a way that will enable that person the best chance of hearing you and responding. What will happen over time is you will see a consistent type of information come back from people, enabling you to know how you will receive feedback from each team member. This means you will be able to avoid the frustration of not being on the same page as them, as you know the page they are reading from.

So the question you might ask is: “What is the relationship between these three coins?”

Same or different

And you might respond with….

Sameness only; these three coins are the same, they are all round, they all say liberty and they all have a face on them.

Sameness with exceptions; these three coins are all the same, except one has the head upright.

Sameness and differences equally; they are all the same colour, they are all round, they are all sitting in a different spot, two are turned to the left and one is pointing up.

Differences with similarities; the three coins are sitting in different spots and some are orientated differently, but they are all round and the same colour.

Differences only; the coins are not orientated the same.

How you might speak to each filter type.

Sameness only = “It’s the same kind of task as you’ve been doing…”

Sameness with exceptions = “this is the same as the last project, except a different client…”

Sameness with differences equally = “this job has the same title as the last one you did, it should have the same outcome, but you will also find there are less details in the description and a different client.”

Differences with similarities = “this job is very different to the last one you did, though it is with the same customer.”

Differences only = “this job is different to anything we have done before.”

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?


I like this meta program, this is the preferred interest filter. Basically people what people are interested in can be categorized into these 5 things and if we want to have great friendships we should take heed of these 5 things and make an effort to engage in the ones our friends like.

Interests can be categorised into people, places, things, activities and information.

Take me for example; I am obsessed with personal development. I love reading, listening to audio books and talking about what I read. I talk about what I read and I tell others they should consume the same information.

I have another friend (not so close any more) that loves to play team sports, he loves going out and doing activities. 

I hope you are getting the gist by now. When trying to figure out a persons interest filter, you are looking for the following.

Do they spend their time talking about the people they have interacted with, the places they have been, the things that they bough, the activities they did or the information they recall about it.

And if you want to communicate within their model you might say….

People = “Tell me about who went with you…”

Places = “Tell me what places you went to …”

Things = “Tell me what things you bought while on holidays…”

Activities = “What did you do while you were away…”

Information = “What did you learn while you were away, what was the history of…”

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?


People will have a preference when it comes to how they perform a specific focus on their approach to how they tackle a situation. In NLP Meta program terms we are talking about a persons performance filter.

It is the natural way they like to get their job done, and it is made up of three key approaches; the independent player, the team player and the management player.

Ask your self this question: “Where do you perform the best-when you’re working solo, as a part of a team, or when you are leading a team?”

When you know your preference, embrace it. Do what ever you can to fulfil that roll on projects, knowing you will get the most out of the experience.

If you are a manager, consider how you communicate to peoples performance filter.

For the independent player you might say “you are excellent at performing on your own and I would like you to go off and smash this task”.

The Team player you might say “you work best in a team and I would ask that you work with us to get this job done”.

The management player is not after your job, they are just a person that likes to lead a team. You might say something like “you are a take charge kind of person, can you lead the team on this project”.

When we are flexible in our communication and focus on using people’s strengths, we will always get a better result. It starts with you know your self and then taking the time to know others.

Rock and Roll


PS. What’s the one thing you don’t do, that would cause the most positive change in your life?

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